Is that a hand poking out? 36 weeks 4 days

On Tuesday I had my first weekly doctor appointment and thus my first exam. I've been advised not to have exams done until absolutely necessary (39-40 weeks) because they can cause infections and because if any progress has been made then you tend to get overly excited for no reason. I agreed to the exam because, well, I'm impatient and excited and was really curious to see if I had made any progress. And good news! I'm 1cm dilated and 60% effaced! And now I'm really overly excited, and Jimmy even more so. I ask him at least once a week to go on a walk with me and he usually turns me down, but now he wants to go for walks every day to help move things along. Of course we both know it will happen when it's supposed to happen, but we're just so darn excited!

I've been having more of those stabbing cervical pains lately. I'm thinking the more pain, the more progress. The last couple days I've had quite a bit of these sensations so who knows maybe I'm 3cm by now! Sheeyeah, right. I can dream, can't I. I'm still feeling pretty well most of the time. It's getting harder to get comfortable when I sleep and I need help sitting up and tying my shoes sometimes. And today I noticed that my cankles are coming in. My legs and feet feel tight and a bit swollen, but I'm not waddling quite yet. I still haven't felt any contractions but apparently I could still be having them. My stomach does tighten up regularly so I guess this could be pre-labor contractions, they're just undetectable. Pain-free contractions - love it.


I cannot believe I only have three and a half weeks until my due date. It's so weird that Zoey can arrive pretty much any day now. Jimmy and I are so excited we can barely stand it.

• How far along?: 36 weeks
  
• Weight gain: 18 pounds
  
• Maternity clothes: blah. I miss real pants.
  
• Sleep: Lots of tossing and turning and trying to get comfortable and getting up to pee a lot.
  
• Stretch marks: I don't want to talk about it.
  
• Movement: Lots of big, weird movements and the stabbing pains down low and in my legs.
  
• Gender: Girl!!!
  
• Best moment of this week: Hearing I was 1cm dilated on Tuesday!
  
• Food cravings: Nothing notable really. I've actually had some nausea lately and haven't felt very hungry most of the time.
  
• Belly button in or out: In!
  
• What I miss most: Booze and real pants.
  
• What I'm looking forward to: My appointment next Tuesday. Anyone think I can get to 2cm by then? :)

Nighty night!
Ash

Now all I need is a baby. 35 weeks 6 days.

The nursery is all put together. Everything has been washed, sanitized, and organized. All the gear that blinks, shakes, or sings has batteries. We've attended a breastfeeding class and next week we learn about Infant Care for the First Six Weeks of Life. We have two weeks of Bradley classes left. I'm running out of reasons to go to Target. We are so ready for this baby, which means I'm super bored.

I use the term "ready" loosely, because of course you can always use more time in these situations. However I do feel like if I went into labor right now I would feel totally confident in our preparedness. We've been practicing the labor techniques we learned in class, so I feel like we have that down pretty well. The only reason why going into labor now would not be good is because I still have some projects to wrap up at work. My temporary replacement started this past week so I've been working on training her which is taking time away from my being productive in the final weeks. She's really nice and she's been in HR for something like 30 years. I really hope she doesn't do a better job than I do, otherwise they may not want me to come back! Must.. find a way.. to sabotage her...

I've been having those annoying stabbing pains more often. I asked my doctor about them a couple weeks ago and she said it's just the baby moving around, and since space is limited as she gets bigger that's why it's becoming painful. It feels like Zoey is headbutting my cervix, trying to break free! I don't think I've had any more contractions, and if I have then they aren't painful. My stomach does feel awfully tight sometimes so perhaps those are very mild Braxton Hicks contractions. Other than that I'm feeling really good lately. I'm not giant and swollen yet and I still have a good amount of energy. I do get tired pretty early - in fact last night (Friday) I started nodding off at 9:30. How lame am I! I used to be quite the night owl. Now I can't even make it through the local news.

I have a feeling Zoey is going to arrive early. Not really sure why, just a premonition I have. :)

• How far along?: 35 weeks
  
• Weight gain: 17 pounds
  
• Maternity clothes: So tired of the elastic waist bands that go up to my arm pits. I miss my old clothes.
  
• Sleep: I love to sleep, any time of day. I still have to get up two to three times a night to go to the bathroom.
  
• Stretch marks: Oh my god they are coming on fast and furious now. Every time I feel an itch on my belly I know another one is popping up. So very sad. :(
  
• Movement: I get kicked in the ribs pretty often, hiccups are pretty regular, and she likes to stretch and swim around a lot.
  
• Gender: Girl!!!
  
• Best moment of this week: 5:00pm on Friday when I could finally relax! It has been a long week.
  
• Food cravings: I have to have sweets almost daily, other than that nothing notable.
  
• Belly button in or out: In, and doesn't look like it's going anywhere.
  
• What I miss most: Booze. And a stomach free of blemishes.
  
• What I'm looking forward to: My appointment on Tuesday. I think I may have my first internal this week, so here's hoping for some progress!
• Words of wisdom: "There's no hope without dope." -Jake's dad, after I told him I'm having a natural birth
  

It just got real. 33 weeks 6 days

I thought I was above it, invincible even. I went through my days confident and unguarded. I thought hey, I'm different, it will never happen to me.

Well, I was wrong. Way wrong. I got my first stretch mark two days ago and I almost cried.

I expected I would get stretch marks from day one but since I'm in the home stretch and haven't seen one little blemish yet I thought I was exempt from this very common pregnancy occurrence. I certainly didn't think when it happened that I would get upset about, but I guess that's what happens when you've got all kinds of hormones flying around. It's going to be okay, I'll just stock up on belly balm and apply every hour on the hour. Looks like my dreams of making the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue are over.

I think I've been having Braxton Hicks contractions this past week. I say "I think" because if that's what it is then they feel nothing like I thought they would. I've heard contractions feel like a tightening sensation in your belly, and what I started feeling was a sharp, stabby pain a bit lower... It's very sudden, this stabby sensation, and then I feel a sudden urge to pee. Needless to say I've been running off to the bathroom a lot lately. Now every time this happens I feel my belly to see if there is any "tightening", and a couple times there has been. I know these are just "practice" contractions but it's still pretty exciting!

Apparently I still don't look as pregnant as I am. I got an "I hate you" from a coworker the other day when she overheard me telling another person how far along I am. I don't even know this person! I asked my doctor last week if she thought the baby's growth was on track and she said I was measuring just fine and everyone carries differently in pregnancy. So I guess everything is okay with Zoey, she's just going to be a little lady. :) I can tell she is getting bigger because I often have to lean back to give her more room when she starts swimming around. I just recently started feeling her feet/hands in my ribs, which is really weird. She can really get up in there with those little appendages! I love watching my belly morph when she gets really active. It's like that freaky scene from Alien right before the creature pops out of that guy's stomach.

My mom and sister threw me a fabulous baby shower for all the family a couple weeks ago. I think I'm just now recovering from that weekend! All the ladies came into town and we had a lovely family weekend. Mom and Rachel made these amazing floral arrangements and decorated in a yellow, black and white bee theme and it was all so pretty! And the guests were so generous - I think we have everything we need to bring this baby home, and then some. Of course I'm sure I'll go shopping a few times between now and then, but as far as all the gear and necessities we are all set. I'm shocked at how many of our big items we got at our various baby showers. I felt really bad registering for them, because a lot of this baby stuff is so expensive, but thought why not, maybe we'll get one or two larger items. In the end I think the only big item we had to buy ourselves was the crib. We have the most thoughtful and generous friends and family! I'm so SO thankful for all of them.

Other updates: I'm really tired all the time, I can't stay awake past 11:00pm, I go to the bathroom about 47 times a day, and I'm really tired of wearing maternity clothes. I can't wait until I can wear pants with a button and a zipper again! I dread getting dressed every morning because I'm tired of my limited wardrobe and I really don't want to buy more maternity clothes that I will only be wearing for the next 6-8 weeks. Grr.

• How far along?: 33 weeks
  
• Weight gain: 12 pounds (net)
  
• Maternity clothes: All the way. I hate them.
  
• Sleep: I get up twice every night to go to the bathroom, toss and turn a lot, and wake up at the slightest sounds. Then I have terrible hip pain for the next three hours.
  
• Stretch marks: I don't want to talk about it.
  
• Movement: LOTS. I can feel her hiccups, too.
  
• Gender: Girl!!!
  
• Best moment of this week: Not peeing myself at the store when I thought I was going to.
  
• Food cravings: Nothing significant, aside from my daily sugar fix. Jimmy mentioned that he's surprised he hasn't had to run out to get me food in the middle of the night when a sudden craving strikes, so I realized I should really be milking this pregnancy thing a little more... stay tuned.
  
• Belly button in or out: In, and doesn't look like it's going anywhere.
  
• What I miss most: My energy and my clothes.
  
• What I'm looking forward to: Having a baby! Well, not "having" the baby, per se, but having her on the outside.
• Milestones: Zoey weighs about 4 pounds and is 17 inches long.

TTFN,
Ash

You gonna eat that? 30 weeks 6 days

As part of my Bradley Method training I have to keep track of what I eat every day. The idea is to make sure I'm getting enough protein, not to count calories or carbs. One reason I like this program is that they basically encourage you to be a fatty. Well, okay, they don't so much encourage it as they don't discourage it. Most doctors and websites out there will say a gain of 25-35 pounds is healthy for most people during pregnancy. The Bradley Method says to eat 80 to 100 grams of protein, plus a quart - that's right, QUART - of milk, fruits, vegetables, whole grains and two eggs every day, and if in doing so you gain 75 pounds then that's okay. Unless you're eating really unhealthy food all the time then there's no need to worry about gaining weight during pregnancy. I mean what are you supposed to do, go on a diet? It's probably never a good idea to purposefully restrict nutrients at any point in pregnancy. Plus everyone gains weight differently, so it's not really fair to expect everyone to gain 25-35 pounds. I've gained about 12 so far (after I lost 10 and then gained that back), and from what I can tell it's all in my belly area. Since about week 20 when the nausea went away I've been doing surprisingly well with eating healthy. Keeping track of what I eat really helps that. When you have to write down everything you consume and then turn it in for someone else to examine it really makes you think twice before pigging out. I never have a problem getting enough protein, but eating five times a day helps that. I don't always eat two eggs a day but I am eating a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables, peanut butter, Greek yogurt (my favorite new food discovery), yogurt, cheese, whole grains and milk. I love that we now always have a big bowl of fruit on the counter, spinach is always on hand and there are no less than six varieties of cheese in the fridge at all times. I love cheese.

Okay, so don't let me fool you into thinking I'm eating perfect all the time. My sweet tooth owns me at this point. I can't resist cookies! And chocolate milk. And brownies. So I usually have a little something sweet almost every day, with some milk of course so I can get my protein quota. I also love fries, always have, so I may have some of those once a week. But hey, fries and cookies have protein and other good things...I guess. I have to give up sashimi, all the good cheeses, real steak and wine for 40 weeks, so if I want a cookie here and there I'm going to have one!

I decided that the first thing I want to eat after I give birth is a medium rare filet marsala from Carrabba's and an Id roll from In the Raw, which I will wash down with a REGULAR triple grande nonfat caramel macchiato from Starbucks. [I would wash it all down with a bottle of Seven Deadly Zins but I will have to breastfeed so the booze will have to wait] The first person to bring me these items gets to hold the baby first (after Jimmy and I, of course). You have your assignment. Now make me proud.

Crunch Time. 30 weeks 4 days

I'm really bad at updating this blog thing. Not much has been going on lately I guess, at least nothing too exciting. Jimmy and I have completed five weeks of Bradley childbirth classes so we're almost halfway done and we've already learned so much. Going to the classes and practicing the relaxation methods and doing the daily exercises has significantly boosted my confidence about going into labor. However I still get pretty nervous if I start to think about actually pushing a baby out of my body. Even though I feel like I will be very prepared to go into labor and I'm reading and learning a lot, there are still a lot of unknowns. How will contractions really feel? How will I react to the pain? Will I be able to have a sense of humor about it and try to enjoy labor and delivery (this is what I'm aiming for but L&D can make a bitch crazy!). What if something goes wrong? Will I have the focus and patience to weigh all the options if I have to make a quick decision during all the pain? Of course Jimmy will be with me the whole time as my "coach" and he's learning all the same things I am so we can both make educated decisions throughout the process. I'm not spending too much time worrying about all this, but it does pop into my mind a few times a week. This labor thing will be no walk in the park, but I'm going to try to make the most of it with a positive, relaxed attitude.

I'm now in that stage of pregnancy where I have to go to the doctor every two weeks. Two weeks ago, on my birthday, I had an appointment which included an ultrasound. My doctor wanted to check out what she called "veinous lakes" on the placenta - I guess sometimes there can be too many of these, and my previous ultrasound had indicated this might be the case. Well it turns out everything looked fine, and we got to see Zoey for a few minutes after the ultrasound tech checked out the placenta. We got some really good pictures of her profile and face. She was again being modest, keeping her little legs crossed, so the tech couldn't confirm that she is in fact a girl. She said she could kind of see the three lines that indicate "female" so that was good enough for us. Zoey weighed about 2 pounds 11 ounces at 28 weeks, which my doctor said put her in the 32nd percentile for her size. If she stays on this pace then she'll be on the small side at birth, which is good news for me. I also had to do the glucose test to find out if I had developed gestational diabetes. This only affects about 4% of pregnant women so I wasn't too worried about it. They make you drink this very sweet, syrupy orange bevearge, then you have to wait an hour and have blood drawn. I chugged the stuff like a champ and then felt like I was going to fall asleep or pass out or hurl for the next hour. I thought for sure this was a bad sign. Turns out everything is fine! No diabetes for me. And thank goodness, I don't think I could give up cookies for the next 9 weeks.

I finally look undisputably pregnant. Well, at least I think so. Any time someone asks me how far along I am I get really baffled looks. I say "30 weeks," and then they stare off for a minute while they do the math (yes, that is seven and a half months, technically), then they stare at my belly for an uncomfortably long amount of time, and then I feel awkward because people are staring at me, and then they say, "Wow! Where is the baby?" This is good and bad. Good: I am not a big fat pregnant whale. Bad: I must just look fat to most people, and, considering I don't suck in or wear clothes that would hide my belly, those people must think I just like to let it all hang out. I mean they're just people, who obviously don't know me well, but I still don't like the stares.

My energy has been really good lately. I've been going on a lot of walks after work since the weather has been amazing. I still get tired early in the evening but other than that I've been feeling really well and as "normal" as can be expected. I haven't had any swelling, no jowls yet, just a belly that grows a little rounder every day!

What else has been going on..... did I mention I'm having a baby in or around nine weeks from now? So much to do, so little time.

• How far along?: 30 weeks
  
• Weight gain: 10 pounds (net)
  
• Maternity clothes: All the way. My regular shirts are too short to cover my belly, for the most part. Even some of my maternity pants that have the partial stretch band are getting to be uncomfortable, and I'm only going to get bigger!
  
• Sleep: My hips hurt throughout the night and for a good part of the morning. I've started wedging pillows around me to cushion my sides and belly, which makes turning over tricky. I get up once or twice a night to go to the bathroom now.
  
• Stretch marks: Nope! Thank you Burt's Bees Belly Balm. Woohoo!
  
• Movement: Zoey is doing acrobatics in there all the time. I think I felt her hiccuping the other day.
  
• Gender: Girl!!!
  
• Best moment of this week: The whole week has been pretty good - I've had a productive week at work and the weather has been lovely!
  
• Food cravings: Cookies, milk, anything sweet, and carbs (I can eat pasta every day). I'm back to hating chicken again.
  
• Belly button in or out: Still in! Told you so, Jimmy :)
  
• What I miss most: Booze. I could really go for a nice wheat beer on the patio after work.
  
• What I'm looking forward to: Baby shower next weekend!
  
• Milestones: Zoey's brain is getting wrinkly and is growing rapidly.
  

Hello, third trimester! 27 weeks 3 days

Well, I've made it to the final stretch! I'm officially in the last stage of this odd and exciting journey, and I have to say I'm getting a bit freaked out. Jimmy and I took a tour of the hospital's labor and delivery wing last night. I was really excited to see where it's all going to go down, but it also kind of scared me! I think because that made it more real. I got to see where my daughter is going to be born. I'm going to have a baby. A girl baby. A girl baby that I have to take care of for the rest of my life. Oh man.

We started our Bradley classes two weeks ago and so far so good. I'm really glad we decided to do this; maybe I could have done it med-free if I simply put my mind to it, but I feel like the Bradley classes are really preparing me mentally and physically for this undertaking. Plus we have a great support group in our instructor and the other couples in our class. I think most of labor is going to be mental. I have to have the right attitude and I have to be relaxed and focused and I can deal with the pain. The pain is only temporary, right?... Right. And Jimmy is going to be there to distract me and make sure I'm relaxing. If he passes out I don't know what I'll do!

We had two baby showers last week, and they were a blast! Chase and Natalie threw one for my friends on February 21. We got so many lovely gifts from our wonderful friends; I feel so blessed and fortunate to know all of them. Jimmy's coworkers threw us a shower the next day, and they hooked us up too! At this point we have all the necessities, lots of adorable clothes and some fun stuff too. And we still have our family baby shower in April, which I'm so excited for. My mom and sister have been working hard on getting it all together and I know they're going to do a great job. Plus I'll get to spend a nice weekend with my family!

Belly Watch 2010: I think I'm finally starting to look preggo! I still haven't gained much weight but the belly is starting to round out. I got my first thoughtless comments from coworkers last week. Both were to the effect of, "Are you pregnant? Oh, I thought you were just gaining weight." Um, really? I know they weren't necessarily calling me fat, because I am pregnant after all so I have an excuse to have a belly, but they weren't exactly congratulating me either. It was more like, "Oh yeah, I noticed you have looked like a schlub lately and I would like to point this out to you in a very tactless manner. Not that I am in any way fit or attractive myself; however, I do like to make people feel as miserable as I do." Jerks. I have a feeling I'll be hearing more of these thoughtless comments over the next 13 weeks so I'm not going to let it get to me. I just find it kind of amazing that people think they can say whatever they want to a pregnant lady.

• How far along?: 27 weeks
• Weight gain: 3 pounds (net)
  
• Maternity clothes: All pants are now of the maternity variety. I had to make a weekday trip to Motherhood Maternity last week because my pre-preg pants with the Bella Band were getting sooo uncomfortable. Now I'm living large in these glorious maternity pants where the stretchy belly area goes practically up to my arm pits. They are heaven.
  
• Sleep: I have to get up at least once per night to go to the bathroom, and I always wake up before my alarm goes off. My hips had been hurting for the last few weeks so I had the genius idea of spooning a body pillow while I sleep - it's so comfortable! Now if I could only sleep in I would be so happy.
  
• Stretch marks: Nope! Thank you Burt's Bees Belly Balm.
  
• Movement: Frequent, and getting stronger. I can see it when she kicks now!
  
• Gender: Girl!!!
  
• Best moment of this week: My great body pillow idea :)
  
• Food cravings: I'm not having any weird pregnant lady cravings, but some things I really enjoy right now are Greek yogurt (yum!), milk, and cookies.
  
• Belly button in or out: In, but getting smaller...
  
• What I miss most: Again, my energy. I'm so tired all the time! And I'm usually happy to stay at home and relax. Not like me at all.
  
• What I'm looking forward to: Doctor appointment on my birthday next week - I get another ultrasound so I'm hoping everything looks perfect and they can tell us how big she is.
• Milestones: Zoey's eyes are open, and she weighs over two pounds.

I'm sleepy...
Smash

Just keepin' it real... 24 weeks 2 days

Since we found out we're having our little Zoey Claire we've been working on the little diva's room. Jimmy painted it a lovely muted purple. It's very soothing and pretty but not too make-you-wanna-puke girly. We found a lovely stretched canvas painting that fit the room perfectly so of course we had to pick that up too. We also purchased a couple outfits - a pretty dress from Baby Gap and a pink and white Cubs onesie with matching bib and booties (an early birthday gift from me to Jimmy). I mean she has to have something to wear when she and her papa watch the games together this fall. We installed a shelf and extra hang bar in the closet and I've been busy washing and folding all the hand-me-downs we've been given so far. And now we wait for the baby showers...

Everything is going well so far! I was just thinking the other day that I've really lucked out with this pregnancy. Other than the AWFUL morning sickness for the first 4 months, I haven't had any complications. I've barely gained any weight so far, my feet aren't swollen, I can still wear a lot of my pre-preg clothes and my doctor always says things are looking great. I feel really lucky. Almost on a daily basis I have someone tell me I don't even look pregnant; however I think that will change in the next couple weeks. Zoey weighs about a pound a half now and she is growing more rapidly. It used to be that she would gain only a half an ounce to an ounce each week but now we're talking about eight ounces a week. Jimmy read somewhere that I could gain 10 pounds in the next 3 weeks. Good lord I really hope that doesn't happen. The belly is getting quite round though! It's very exciting to see it grow. The belly can get as big as it wants as long as I don't get the jowls and cankles.

My doctor told me at my appointment today that she is also pregnant! AND she is due TWO DAYS before me. Talk about bad timing. I'm not going to switch doctors because I really like mine but I will get to know another another doctor in the practice so I can have a back up just in case. Hopefully Zoey will be anxious to get out here and arrive early!

After scaring myself into thinking that delivering a baby will split me in two and I can't do it on my own, I have once again decided that I CAN have this baby naturally. Women do it every day and so can I. I mean it's not going to feel great, I know that, but it's nothing I can't handle. In order to prepare for this undertaking Jimmy and I decided to take Bradley Method classes. The classes are once a week for 12 weeks and they start next Wednesday. I'm excited, I think this will be very beneficial for us in reaching our goal of a natural birth. Of course I know things don't always go the way you want in childbirth so I'm going to be flexible on my birth plan. Ideally, though, I would like to go med-free. My mom did it three times, so surely I can do it. Right?....

• How far along?: 24 weeks
• Weight gain: -1 pound
• Maternity clothes: I'm still wearing pre-preg clothes (pants require the Bella Band) but prefer maternity pants. They are soooo comfy. Plus if I wear regular pants I just look chubby.
  
• Sleep: I still can't sleep in and I wake up frequently throughout the night. My hips start to hurt after sleeping on one side for too long.
  
• Stretch marks: Nope!
  
• Movement: Lots! She's swimming around all the time and kicking a lot.
  
• Gender: Girl!!!
  
• Best moment of this week: Hearing her heartbeat today (150 bpm).
  
• Food cravings: I'm still not having cravings really. I enjoy drinking milk a lot more than I used to.
  
• Belly button in or out: In, but getting smaller...
  
• What I miss most: My energy and drive to stay up late and go out. Most of my friends work nights so that makes it difficult to see them because I get tired at 9:00 every night.
  
• What I'm looking forward to: I get another ultrasound in four weeks, yay!!
• Words of Wisdom: "Contractions are just like cramps, only worse." - Mom
  
• Milestones: Zoey isn't translucent anymore and she has passed the one pound mark!

Just waiting for that belly button to pop out,
Mama Bear