I had my 12 week appointment today! We got to hear the heartbeat via the doppler device, and let me tell you hearing the heartbeat never gets old. It took the doctor a couple minutes to locate the the baby but eventually there it was in my lower right abdomen. She said the heartbeat sounded strong and perfect, and of course we agreed. I could sit and listen to that woosh-woosh-woosh sound all day long. It's so comforting.
Since I haven't had any complications I've felt pretty confident since the 8 week ultrasound, but still cautious enough that I'm not spreading the good news to just anyone yet. I have to admit I went into this appointment today with a little trepidation after reading about ladies who have had missed miscarriages around this point in pregnancy. It's one thing to see blood and know what has happened, but to find out weeks later that the baby stopped growing but you never knew it has to somehow be more devastating. I was so worried we wouldn't hear the heartbeat and then the worrying would continue from there... Well I just have to stop worrying. I know it doesn't do any good - it's not going to stop anything bad from happening nor will it create only good things. I just need to be positive and think happy thoughts because a) I don't need anymore wrinkles, and 2) I want to enjoy being pregnant! I'm in the "safe zone" now so it's time to get that happy pregnant lady glow! Second trimester starts in 8 days... I cannot wait.
The nausea is getting a little better. I had a lot of energy and a good appetite yesterday, so why wouldn't I eat a two-piece and a biscuit (and mashed potatoes and some macaroni and cheese) for dinner? I totally noshed on my delicious home cookin' dinner and then proceeded to lose it all about 30 minutes later. It is so hard to slow down when you're starving and haven't eaten more than about 600 calories a day in the last 8 weeks. It feels so good to eat while I'm eating, but a few minutes later it's a whole other story. I know my limit, I just need to stick to it. I just ate a burger (and fries) and I'm really hoping I won't be revisiting that meal any time soon.
I still have to wait 9 days to tell my extended family! I have a strong desire to say something on Facebook right now. Not really sure why because I hate when people make dumb status updates like people really care what you're up to every minute of the day. I'm not assuming everyone on Facebook cares that I'm pregnant, but I think it will feel good to finally "out" myself and not hide my pregnancy anymore. I think I'll post it next week, the day after Thanksgiving when my whole family knows.
I really need to make some friends who have babies. Friends who understand this whole thing. My friends are very understanding but I know I'll need the support of fellow mothers pretty soon. I can already tell this little butter bean is going to drastically change my social life. I didn't have a wild and crazy night life to begin with, but I'm feeling pretty isolated at this point. I don't know if people think I just want to stay home all the time now or what but let's just say the phone has been quiet... hey, I don't have a baby yet! I need to get out and about before I'm waddling and my feet are too swollen to wear real shoes. I'm sure some of the isolation is in my head, but not all of it is. And some nights I do just want to stay home and relax. But I'm getting really sick of looking at the inside of my house. Something has to change or I'm going to lose it.
But right now all I feel is happy. I'm so glad the little butter bean is doing well and I have nothing to worry about. All is good.
Cheers,
Mama Bear
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